garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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