thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
