i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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