He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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