Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Randomize
