so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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