nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
