I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
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