Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize