YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Randomize
