No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Randomize
