is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
We smell like vodka and hangover
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