Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize
