ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
