Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Randomize
