we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Randomize
