True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
