69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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