i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
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