he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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