He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
