dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Randomize
