I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
