He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
