Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
so let's talk penis.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
