jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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