it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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