So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
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