i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
