Ambien. No doubt about it.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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