I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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