i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
