Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
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