His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
