i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
