he thought i was a dude.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
