Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
