I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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