I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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