are you still at the devil's house?
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
