Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
I forgot how hot balto sounded
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
