i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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