we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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