He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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