Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
