No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Randomize
