garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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