We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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