check it out our google latitudes are spooning
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
