p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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