i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
